hey :)

i write this blog for one of my friends, i want to tell what i feel but i don't know how to tell it to you. so i decided to write here but i'm not sure you will read it. honestly it's about our problem, maybe it isn't called a problem but i feel there is something wrong between us. if we remembered, at the first time we didn't know each other then suddenly we often chatting on msn. we shared our story and it felt like i have known you since a long time. i didn't know why, maybe because at that time both of us were broken hearted and felt the same feeling so we became friends easily. as i know, you're introvert person so when you shared your story to me however it's not important to you, i felt so happy because you trusted me for being your friend. i was also happy when you asked my opinion about your tag line for your student council. at that time i couldn't help you at all, just could pray for you and hope you would be accepted. when i made some pictures for helping your promotion, it was too late but you still appreciated it. then when you supported me to get the scholarship you sent me some email and told me how to get it, you also prayed for me too.thanks a lot my friend :) but sorry finally i just made you disappointed. as the time passed, i felt something wrong with my feeling. i was scared of falling for you and sometimes i thought this feeling didn't real. so i tried to hide and hope it would be disappeared asap.then i concluded maybe i didn't fall for you, i just like you, i just like you as a good friend. that's the best conclusion that i can think. reminding the time when i said that i have forgotten my ex crush but i still made some status for him, sorry i lied. and now i promise i won't fall for him again,i don't want to be a fool :P maybe since that time you won't trust me anymore, right?in the past we often chat on msn, but now we seldom do it. to be honest i just want you to share your stories like in the past and being your trusted friend again. i know you have fallen for someone, because sometimes i read your blog and twitter but it doesn't mean i'm your stalker, i just want to know how are you now because it feels i like a stranger who never know you at all whereas in the past you shared your story to me. everytime i ask you, you always said i'm 'sotoy' -.- i hope you aren't getting angry if you read this post, i just want to say what i feel inside. it's up to you if you still called me 'sotoy' or stalker but i'm not that ones. if you think it's better for me to don't know anything about you, i will appreciate you decision too. sorry for my a lot of stupid questions which disturb you. in the end of this post i want to say "all the best for you, friend :) "

hurts the most

It's been a long time
Since the last time, I saw you
Feels like nothing changed since we've been together
I must admit that I go crazy 'bout you

And I can see it in your eyes
That there's something you want to say to me
Cause usually right now you'd be holding on to me
But instead you're telling me

The things have changed, they're not the same
And recently you found someone that you
Decided to dedicate your whole life to
And what we had has got to be through

And what hurts the most is letting go
I just want you to know that I love you so
I know things are different now, you've gone and settled down
And I thought for sure you'd always wait for me

I'll tell you what hurts the most is I should have took the chance
Boy, when you came to me and offered me your hand
Silly of me, I thought, I'd always have your heart
I had the chance to have all the love, how I'm missing you now

I hate that there is someone new
Coming in and taking my place
Doing the things that we used to do
And making love to you

And oh, what am I supposed to do?
It's killing me 'cause I want you
And you should have known my love was true
And there's no one else in this world for me but you

I know that I'm the one to blame for losing you
I really, really wish that I could be happy for you
There's just one thing I need you to do
Don't you touch her like you used to touch me
Don't you love her like you really need me
Don't you love her like you used to love me

What hurts the most is letting go
Just to let you know, I love you so
What hurts the most.....

hatethissomuch

i hate when people lie to me and they don't tell the truth however i've known the truth but they still keep lying

i hate when people break their promise whatever the reasons are. if they can't fulfill their promise, they shouldn't make it

i hate when people talk behind my back. just tell to me directly because i will accept it if i think it's true

i hate when people felt so hopeless and they said no one care to them anymore.in fact, God is still care to them,right?remember He never leaves His children

i hate when people never feel graceful in their life because there are so many people whose life is worse than them but they still feel graceful

i hate when people want to know my secret but they don't allow me to know their secret

i hate when people CHANGE!!when people i was so close with can become just another stranger that i don't know

and the last one i hate how the people who can make me smile is the one who made me cry

apple tree :)

i have read an article which is very GREAT and then i try to draw this picture with paint (it's really hard and take a long time -.-) long time i don't update my blog because this week is so damn busy. after update my blog i have to study biology aaa i really hate it. there are a lot of tests this week and it happens almost everyday!really need holiday asap :p now, i will write what this picture about.here it is....
girls are like apples on trees. the best ones are at the top of the tree. the boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. so the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're AMAZING. they just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who's BRAVE enough to climb all the way to the top oh the tree :D